Still Here Somehow

[Intro] Six seventeen. The kettle clicks. I put my feet back on the floor. [Verse 1] Some mornings I don’t call it living It’s just the things I have to do But the cup is warm between my hands And the window’s turning blue There are messages unanswered There are clothes across the chair Still I open up the curtains Still I let the daylight in [Pre-Chorus] There was no moment I got better No clear line I crossed somehow Yesterday just kept on ending And I kept arriving here [Chorus] I’m still here somehow Not shining, not repaired Just breathing in the kitchen Like I have a right to air I didn’t rise above it I learned to live around Everything I thought would finish me And I’m still here somehow [Verse 2] Someone asks me where their shoes are I find them underneath the bed I make a list, I lose my patience Then I kiss the smallest head I have laughed without intending I have sung along by chance And for three whole minutes yesterday I didn’t miss who I had been [Pre-Chorus] Maybe healing isn’t something That arrives and makes a sound Maybe it is noticing Your feet still touch the ground [Chorus] I’m still here somehow Not fearless, not untouched There are nights I feel the weight of it And mornings not as much I didn’t beat the darkness I just stopped backing down It can sit beside me if it wants But I’m still here somehow [Bridge] I thought surviving would be louder Raised fists and open doors I thought I’d know the day it happened Feel different than before But it looked like buying groceries And answering my name It looked like washing one more cup And waking up again [Breakdown] Not every day is victory Some days are only days But I was there to see them end And here when morning came I carried what I couldn’t cure I laid down what I could I’m not grateful for the breaking But I’m glad I understood [Final Chorus] I’m still here somehow And maybe that is enough I don’t have to call it beautiful To know that it was tough I don’t need a perfect ending Or a reason written down I can love the life that found me here And still not know quite how I’m still here somehow Not shining, not repaired But breathing in the open Like I have a right to air Everything I thought would finish me Is quieter now The morning doesn’t ask me why I’m still here somehow [Outro] The kettle clicks. The window’s blue. I drink it warm. I stay.